And I Keep on Running…


Have you ever felt like you were engulfed while being in a big space? Trying to run away, further and further, only to find that you were surely running yet in all the wrong directions?

This piece is about that feeling…
The feeling of finding out that you are running endlessly and getting nowhere… At least nowhere right… Nowhere you want to end up… Nowhere you that you are supposed to be…

And I keep on running….
Like a deer performing the role of a prey…
Away from the big bad lion that has come out to play…
Trying to escape his sharp claws of memories, his pointed teeth of clay!

And I keep on running…
Helplessly, endlessly, hopelessly…
Towards no one in particular, since none of them really care…
Towards no place to call home, since that place is no longer there…

And I keep on running…
And now I’m out of breath and my feet are sore…
Looking into blank eyes that seem to hate and abhor!
Wanting to find a warm embrace, a cradling shore…

And I keep on running…
And you all keep judging me by the day!
Watching every move I make!
And you all don’t even know me!
Your empathy is a pure fake!

And I keep on running…
Missing the closeness of a real friend,
Craving a real hug, a new beginning to this awful end!

And I keep on running…
In all the wrong directions and there’s nowhere to go!
I act ignorant, but I know, I know…
This tired soul of mine I need to lay down or low!

Cause I can’t keep running…
Not anymore…

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About outlived

X-dreamer, fighter and writer... Using words to unleash the pain that eats me from the inside out, day after day!
This entry was posted in anger, confusion, fear, loss, Love, pain, running. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to And I Keep on Running…

  1. J. Crabb says:

    Hello Beiruta…Haven't meant to be a stranger…I have a dial up connection and your blog takes about 20 minutes to load…I enjoy your words of wisdom on twitter and ThoughtPick has really taken off it seems…I like the way you, Amer and Fadi interact seemily to show all ways of approaching a subject…which in turn forces your readers to think (have thoughts)…I hope to have a faster connection in the near future. I have to remember you are a writer when I read your work…and that you are not about to jump off a high place…another poet/writer I follow is Lorna Dee Cervantes…she actually purchased some of my art work at a little shop in San Jose,CA long before I met her in the '70s…I thought you might want to look at this (it is a blog for her students) http://lornadcervantes.blogspot.com/2005/12/what-was-i-doing.html Somewhere in it she reminds the reader that as the author she has a choice as to what to write and what to leave out, etc. Anyway I though you might find it interesting. Ah Iran…I was a student at San Jose State University in the '70s and would attend Iranian protest of the Shaws rule and learned he was quite brutal…it seems things have gone 360 degrees…I am a vetern of the Vietnam war and know the horrow and insanity of things…senseless…many Americans have no idea…so when you talk somewhat sadly between the lines of Beirut I understand. I have had the opportunity to hear Her Majesty Queen Noor speak on PBS a couple of times recently…Jordan is blessed. I haven't been attending to my writing on my blog or my art work in general…seems I am in an "I keep on running mode…anyway wanted you to know I do come and read…take care,Jim

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